Antidotes to Anticlimax

On LinkedIn another speaker asked for suggestions as to how to recover from post-speech blues. Other speakers seemed to think that the blues were the result of feeling you could have done better. The solution to this is to be a member of two clubs and give the speech again. Go home and write up the new or old version of the speech and rehearse it again.

I'm usually busy editing photos from the event and adding captions and names of people I have met and filing address cards. But you can feel empty if you come home to an empty house.

Or the family are all busy telling you about their events. They don't want to hear how you failed.

I tried to put a reply onto the LinkedIn site but the system was down so here are my immediate suggestions:

1 Blues because nobody said, 'What a great speech!' Concentrate on congratulating others who did well, the good speakers, the new and nervous, the officials who made it run smoothly, the people who did the great catering.

2 Blues because nobody at home to hear you recap what you did well. Write a blog or post about it. Send photos of yourself to club website. Send to local papers. Or send emails congratulating others.

3 Give yourself a Toastmasters International style evaluation. It is a sandwich of praise, suggestions for improvement, ending on praise.

Quotations For Speakers

PREPARING A SPEECH
It takes three weeks to write a good impromptu speech.
Mark Twain

RESEARCH

• George Orwell, (Jun 25, 1903-Jan 2, 1950) author of 1984.
• The best books tell you things you know already.

GET STARTED

• A work which is well begun is already half done. (Roman poet Horace)

CLARITY
Be clear.

• George Orwell, (Jun 25, 1903-Jan 2, 1950) author of 1984.
• Never use a long word when a short one will dol

The best writing is rewriting.

E B White, author of Charlotte's Web; and a book on style.

ORIGINALITY
Always be a first rate version of yourself, not a second rate version of somebody else.
Judy Garland

DELIVERY
Stand and delivery.

FEAR OF SPEAKING
You worry too much.
Rumi

Keep calm and carry on.
Pre-war government poster. UK 1939.

SMILING
A warm smile is the universal language of kindness.
William Arthur Ward

SELF-CENSORSHIP
Too much information.

Loose lips sink ships.
USA. WWII.

WELCOME

SPEAKING
Speech is given to us to clothe our thoughts.
Talleyrand

LISTENING
None so deaf as those that will not hear.

BREVITY
Stand up, speak up, shut up.

Apologies for the long letter. I did not have time to write a short one.

CALL TO ACTION
Do what I say, not what I do.

PERSISTENCE
Never, never, never give up.
Winston Churchill

I am the master of my fate
I am the captain of my soul.
William Ernest Henley.

OBITUARY
Tussser, they tell me, when you were alive
You taught thrift, but you yourself could never thrive
So like the whetstone, many men are won't
To sharpen others, when they themselves stay blunt.

THANKS
Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.
William Arthur Ward

APPLAUSE & PRAISE
I can live for two months on a good compliment.
Mark Twain

CRITICISM


DYING ON STAGE
There are three speeches: The one you wrote. The one you gave. And the one you wish you had given.
US President

DYING OFF STAGE
Death is often referred to as a good career move.
Buddy Holly. (The Day The Music Died.)

Reports of my death have been grossly exaggerated.
Mark Twain

I told you I was ill.
Spike Milligan's gravestone.

Angela Lansbury is the author of Quick Quotations for Successful Speeches.
Lulu.com

Funeral Speeches For your parent or yourself

The most important funeral speech you'll ever have to give is for a parent. Sometimes this is what makes people join Toastmasters International which trains speakers, the thought that they will have to give a speech at a wedding or funeral. When you hear that your parent is terminally ill, or one of them dies and you want to give a speech for another.

If you give a brief summary of your parent's life on every birthday dinner, they have a chance whilst they are still alive and healthy to update you and correct you about details of their life. 

I gave my late father a grandfather's book to fill in. This remains an enduring record of his life for me to consult when making a speech or writing my family history.
   

Add humour, to any speech. On sad occasions, humour helps to lighten the mood. I just reversed that sentence to end it on the positive note. Your first draft of a speech may start with happy memories and end with sad regrets. You can go through it and say the same things, but ending positively. 

Start writing at regular intervals. Your wedding speech should summarise your life so far.
Then a ruby wedding speech to update.
Leave, with your will, an account of your life.    

If you are concerned that close relatives might find you are being irreverent and inappropriate, you might like to quote one of two famous poems, by Christina Rossetti and (attributed to) Elizabeth Frye. 

Useful Websites

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Do_Not_Stand_at_My_Grave_and_Weep

A couple of wonderful uplifting poems from Christina Rossetti

Up Hill

Does the road wind up hill all the way?
       Yes, to the very end.
Will the day's journey take the whole long day?
       From morn to night, my friend.

But is there for the night a resting-place?
       A roof for when the slow dark hours begin?
May not the darkness hide it from my face?
       You cannot miss that inn.

Shall I meet other wayfarers at night?
       Those who have gone before.
Then must I knock, or call when just in sight?
       They will not keep you standing at that door.

Shall I find comfort, travel-sore and weak?
       Of labour you shall find the sum.
Will there be beds for me and all who seek?
       Yea, beds for all who come.

— By Christina Georgina Rossetti^[16]

Song
When I am dead, my dearest,
 Sing no sad songs for me;
Plant thou no roses at my head,
 Nor shady cypress tree:
Be the green grass above me
 With showers and dewdrops wet:
And if thou wilt, remember,
 And if thou wilt, forget.

I shall not see the shadows,
 I shall not feel the rain;
I shall not hear the nightingale
 Sing on as if in pain:
And dreaming through the twilight
 That doth not rise nor set,
Haply I may remember,
 And haply may forget.

I have updated the language to make it easier for myself to read without stumbling over the words:

When I am dead, my darlings,
 Sing no sad songs for me;
No need to plant roses at my head,
 Nor spend on a shady tree:
Just let the green grass above me
 With showers and dewdrops get wet:
When it makes you happy, remember,
While it makes you sad, just forget.

Because I shan't see your shadows,
 I shall not feel the rain;
I shall not hear the any good or bad
 Celebrate, commiserate minor pain:
When you are dreaming through the twilight
 The sun will still rise nor set,
May you remember our happy times,
 As for the sad ones, (just) forget.

-ends-

Please share links to your favourite posts. I have several blogs blogs. The ones which I update daily are travelwithangelalansbury.blogspot.com

dressofthedayangela.blogspot.com

poems hazelnutter.blogspot.com

The Ideal Speech Blueprint

I would like to see a book with three good examples of speeches, 3 good evaluations, 3 bad speeches and 3 bad evaluations. Like storytelling, members should start by delivering one already written speech just to get used to using the stage without needing to write the speech.
   At the end of book I'd like a blueprint/checklist to fill in with a sample speech. It has boxes you fill in for aim of speech, title, quotations, statistics, your name, introduction, summary, first story, link, second story, link, third story, summary, the gestures, metaphors or similes, dialogue, your prop/visual aid, call to action, punchline, tone of delivery.
   At the end each member trained should give a Powerpoint delivery which is on their computer and/or a thumb drive. Plus a video of their last and best speech. The training organisation/ club should print book of the member's speeches. Give the last speech recording to the member for their website, cv or memoirs.

Praise Everybody In The Audience

Supposing I want to talk about the NHS. the newspapers are running horror stories on Nil By Mouth and the Liverpool pathway.  I gave a talk which brought this up. My evaluator warned me that somebody in the audience who worked for the NHS might feel that I was attacking them. They might feel embarrassed. Or angry. Defensive.
   Imagine you are that person. How would you feel? That not all hospitals are the same? That not everybody working in the NHS agrees with these events?
   Adapt your speech accordingly. You could say, many of my friends in the NHS are upset  -
a) upset at being accused and/or
b) upset at what their colleagues are doing
c) upset that quality/practice varies so much from one hospital to another.

   Try to end on a happy note. Involve the audience. Your statement could be as simple as, do we have any patients in the audience? Do we have any doctors? Great. We have a chance to find out from local people what is going on in our area. So we can improve the situation and be confident that we are getting the best available care, from caring staff, for ourselves and our loved ones.

   

   Let's suppose your speech says that you hated your job in telecoms and are now more fulfilled working for charity. You don’t want to alienate anybody in the audience who is in the telecoms industry. The employer may feel aggrieved. The employee may feel undervalued and unappreciated.  What is your message to them? 'Thank people more?’ or  'Work for charity and you will find it rewarding?’ Yesterday’s enemy could be tomorrow’s friend. 

     It would be more tactful to say how you gained good money, or increased confidence, or benefitted from training, or made friends (who you would now like to help gain the satisfaction you later found) in your previous job in telecoms, 

but that you now have both skills and confidence - and an aim in life.